


Stronger Together

by elfin



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-05
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2019-02-28 21:04:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13279854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elfin/pseuds/elfin
Summary: Todd's been wondering - what is Dirk's type of thing?





	Stronger Together

**Author's Note:**

> SPOILERS for season 2

Todd looks at Dirk, can’t keep his eyes off the man, because he’s grinning like all his Christmases have come at once and it’s a good look on him.

There’s a brass plaque on the wall outside, and a wooden sign hanging in their airy, light office. Just as Dirk has always imagined, just like he’s always wanted. He’s staring at it and grinning. 

To be a part of making it happen has brought Todd more happiness, more reward, than he ever could have thought; a far cry from the heart stopping moment when a stranger in a yellow jacket climbed in through his window. 

They’re supposed to be leaving, turning out the lights for the day and joining Farah for dinner. But instead they’re sitting side by side on what’s now Dirk’s desk. There are new computers on each of the three desks now Farah’s no longer wanted by the FBI and her financial assets have been unfrozen. She has a desk, although she’s already warned them she might not be around much. She’s their investor, but Todd suspects she may need to bail them out of trouble more often than she’s expecting.

Todd shuffles back and almost knocks over Dirk’s bright yellow tube of pens onto the bright pink notepad he chose himself. His squeezy toy is around somewhere, the one that keeps turning up in unexpected places. Todd suspects there’s more to it than meets the eye, he suspects it’s not a toy at all but Dirk’s strange friend from Blackwing; the one who prefers to be a thing rather than a person. He thinks Dirk knows he knows, but he’s happy to wait for him to talk when he’s good and ready. For once, he doesn’t need answers until Dirk is happy to give them.

He’s been wondering too about Dirk’s response to his suggestion regarding he and the Beast; the girl from Wendimoor. In one sense, Dirk’s answer was understandable: she’s a wild creature from an imaginary land who doesn’t speak a word of… language. She notionally kept him prisoner in her cave with a vine leash, for a few hours, until he decided it was time he pulled himself together and escaped. 

But at the same time, when he said she wasn’t really his thing, Todd couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he was talking more generally. 

The idea that Dirk preferred men, as opposed to preferring people who’d evolved to walk upright on two legs, has been plaguing Todd since that afternoon. He doesn’t know how to approach the subject, he doesn’t completely know why he wants to approach the subject. Just like he doesn’t know why he keeps backing away from anything meaningful with Farah. 

It’s the reason behind the conversation that starts with Todd saying, ‘Dirk…’ a little experimentally, and Dirk looking over at him expectantly, half-smiling, hair lit up auburn in the evening light that’s burning through the windows. Todd’s mouth is dry.

‘Um?’

‘Can I… ask you something personal?’ He’s stalling.

‘Of course, Todd.’

‘When you said… the girl from the forest isn’t your thing…. Did you mean…? I mean… what is your thing?’

‘You are.’

It never fails to surprise him that Dirk can fumble and fall over the simplest of responses, but on some subjects he’s absolutely crystal clear; usually those subjects Todd stumbles over.

‘Me? Specially, me?’

‘Yes.’

‘Oh.’ 

Dirk continues to sit and gaze happily at his sign on the wall opposite, legs swinging. 

‘Erm.’ It’s all Todd\s brain will give him. 

Dirk turns to look at him, utterly sanguine. ‘What?’ His grin lowers in wattage slightly. ‘You didn’t know?’

‘Was I supposed to?’ He’s a little embarrassed about the way the pitch rises at the end of the question. Almost to a squeak.

‘I didn’t think I was being subtle, Todd.’

‘Subtle? Were there signs that I missed?’

‘Only every interaction I’ve had with you since the morning I gave you a lift to Amanda’s house.’

‘That… that morning? That was like… the second time we met.’

‘Watching you jamming with your sister…’ he smiles, and now he know it’s there, Todd can see it, the simmering affection in those blue eyes. ‘You were really great, and more than anything I wanted to join in. Not that I can play… anything, so I kept watching you and as I watched you, I fell in love with you. Not that I realised that’s what was happening. I mean, I’ve never been in love, I didn’t know that’s how it felt. I just knew I was feeling something I hadn’t felt before and it was nice. While at the same time, it wasn’t.’

Todd is trying to think of something to say, or to be more accurate he’s trying to sort through the multitude of responses his brain is providing, when something explodes out in the road and blows in the front window of their office.

#

Todd answers the phone, and without preamble Amanda asks, ‘Todd! Are you okay? Tell me you’re okay. Farah called and told me about the explosion and the office-’

‘I’m fine, sis. It was a gas explosion,’ Todd explains, ‘they’re coming to replace the window tomorrow.’

‘I was worried about you two!’

‘We’re fine. Well, I’m fine because Dirk decided to get all heroic and protect me from the flying glass.’

Dirk had in fact thrown himself and Todd off the desk and covered Todd’s body with his own as the window shattered inwards, glass raining down on them. 

‘And Dirk?’ She sounds like she’s shouting over traffic noise. They must be in the van, on the road, Todd hopes she’s not planning on visiting with the Rowdy 3 in tow.

‘He got a couple of cuts the paramedics stitched up. They gave him meds that knocked him straight out but he’s fine.’

He’s sleeping, face down in Todd’s pillow, so silent and still that Todd’s checked on him a couple of times to make sure he’s still breathing. There’s a deep laceration in his right shoulder, just above the shoulder blade, and a shallower one in the back of his neck. The paramedic who put a couple of butterfly stitches in each of them actually told Dirk he was very brave. Todd might have laughed if he hadn’t been shaking so hard from the adrenaline draining out of his system. Dirk managed a smile through his tears. 

One of the police officers gave them a lift back to the Ridgely because Dirk asked him if he wouldn’t mind. Given Dirk’s innate ability to piss people off, he does have a knack of turning on the charm when it’s really needed.

‘Are you sure you’re both okay?’

‘I’m sure. We’re fine. Don’t worry, okay? Where are you guys anyway?’

‘Texas.’ So no surprise visit then. He’s relieved, as much as he would love to see her. It’s a fragile peace that’s been established between Dirk and the Rowdies, he’s in no fit state to deal with them. ‘I’ll call in a couple of days. Take care of Dirk, Todd. You don’t deserve him.’

She ends the call. Todd rolls his eyes and slides his phone across the coffee table, sitting back and letting his gaze come to rest on Dirk’s sleeping face. 

In all the excitement the conversation in the office, before the explosion, has been lost. But not forgotten. Todd wants to ask Dirk about what he meant by ‘falling in love’, about what that means to him, whether he might like to see what it means for both of them. But right now, Dirk is injured and drugged. It’s not fair to push the advantage, so he lets it lie for the time being.

#

He should be working, he thinks. There must be paperwork, he’s in an office after all, being paid to be an employee of the detective agency. But he’s distracted; he can’t take his eyes off Dirk who appears to be carrying files from one filing cabinet to another filing cabinet for reasons beyond anyone’s comprehension - Todd suspects - but Dirk himself. 

He’s by far the most irritating person Todd has ever met. Fifty percent of the things he says are admittedly annoying. But of the other fifty percent, half of those things threaten to break his heart and the other half make it beat faster. No one else has ever affected him in the same way, no one has ever had that kind of impact on him. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that Dirk is easy on the eyes; the surprising red of his hair, the bright blue of his eyes, the sunshine smile. And his accent does things to Todd he doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to put into words without blushing. 

He doesn’t know if it’s love, not yet, but it’s something special, something important, something he has to acknowledge sooner or later, or risk losing it. 

‘Dirk?’

He rises and turns in a staggered, ungraceful motion. It’s a complete mystery to Todd how a man who has faced countless bizarre and inexplicable dangers, not to mention threats to his life, can be startled by the call of his own name. 

Todd drops his feet from his desk to the floor and gets up from his chair, strides across the office to where Dirk stands, arms full of empty brown envelopes. 

‘Todd?’

Whatever he was going to say is overridden at the last minute by something that a part of his brain apparently feels is more important than a potential future with Dirk as something more than his friend and partner. 

‘What’s with the tie?’

Dirk looks as confused as Todd quite honestly is.

‘What?’

‘The tie. You’re literally the only person I know who wears one outside of interviews, weddings and funerals.’

‘Oh.’ He glances down, brows furrowed. ‘I don’t know. I… like wearing one?’

‘Do you?’

He hesitates. ’Yes?’

‘In which case, it’s absolutely fine. You should wear whatever you feel comfortable in. It just doesn’t look very comfortable. It looks like it could constrict your breathing, especially at those times when your rare connection to the universe needs us to run away very fast.’

The expression on Dirk’s face makes it clear that this isn’t a problem he’s even considered before. ‘I… I suppose it might.’

Todd smiles, lifts his hands then pauses. ‘May I?’

Dirk nods in jerky, uncertain movements. Oddly humbled, he gently loosens the tight knot at Dirk’s throat. When he’s able, he slips top button to reveal the hollow of his throat. For a paralysing moment he wonders what Dirk’s skin tastes like. He forces himself to take a step back and admire his handiwork. Just that small change and Dirk looks strangely… undressed, almost scandalised. Entirely desirable. 

‘Todd?’

He’s staring, so he nods once and goes back to his desk.

#

‘Stupid, stupid Dirk! Always getting eaten by psychic vampires or kidnapped by the CIA….’

It’s the van that sets him off. Todd sees two guys get out of it on his way in from the coffee shop, they look like maintenance men - dusty t-shirts and ass cracks showing above the falling waistbands - heading into a hardware store on the corner. He thinks nothing of it until he opens the door of the office to find Dirk working his way to a full blown panic attack. He’s pacing to and from the window, wringing his hands together, talking to himself.

‘Hey.’ Todd puts down the cardboard tray and goes over to him, intercepting him en-route to the window. He cups Dirk’s elbow in one hand, his other carefully squeezing Dirk’s shoulder. ‘Hey. It’s just a van, just a couple of guys. It’s not Blackwing.’

Dirk looks at him, tears lining his eyes, barely constrained terror. ‘Are you… sure?’

‘Yes.’ He nods once and with certainty. ‘I’m sure. I saw them. Ass cracks and all. Blackwing isn’t coming for you, Dirk. You know that. And… if they ever do, if they ever dare, and if they get passed me, and Farah, and the Rowdies, and Amanda and Beast, then on their heads be it. Because remember, Dirk, we know where their top secret underground base is now.’

Thanks to Bart, who’s still there, keeping an eye on Ken, and Mona who spent a couple of days as a GPS tracker soon after their return from Bergsberg. As Bart made clear, locks didn’t work on her, and given Mona’s ability to move in and out of anywhere, they’re in pretty regular communication, one way or the other. 

Dirk blinks and the wetness sticks to his lashes but no more tears come. Todd sweeps his hand from Dirk’s shoulder across to the back of his neck. It’s a stretch, given their height difference, and he has to move closer to do it. Dirk drops his forehead against Todd’s and lets the touch comfort him as his breathing returns to normal. There’s the sound of a diesel engine, and they both look up, out of the window, to see the van pull away from the kerb into the traffic. 

‘I’m sorry, Todd. I don’t know what came over me.’

‘You don’t have to apologise. You should have called my cell, or texted me, when you started to worry. And you know, Mona’s around - I think - she won’t let anything happen to you either.’

When they first got back from Wendimoor, Todd was confused and a little jealous of Mona Wilder. But as it turns out, she’s not Dirk’s type of thing either, she prefers to be an object than a person, and she’s very useful to have around when it comes to assuring Dirk’s safety. 

Todd reaches over and picks up the carrier, lifting out Dirk’s tea and the garish pink iced doughnut he bought. Dirk takes both gratefully and the doughnut brings a smile to his face.

‘Thank you, Todd.’

‘You’re welcome.’ He lifts out his own coffee and puts a little distance between them, perching on the edge of his desk. ‘You know, we didn’t finish our conversation, the one we were having before we were rudely interrupted by that gas explosion.’

Dirk looks honestly dumbfounded. ‘I told you you were my sort of thing because you asked me.’

‘But I didn’t get the chance to tell you… that you’re mine.’ Dirk stops with his drink already at his mouth, eyes going wide over the rim of the cup. He adds hurriedly, ’My sort of thing, I mean.’

‘Are you… sure?’

Todd laughs softly. ‘Yes, I’m sure.’

‘It’s just that… well, no one’s ever told me I’m their… sort of thing, before.’

Todd doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to hearing the heart wrenching lines that Dirk throws out so casually. Putting down his coffee, standing up, he crosses to where Dirk seems rooted to the spot and lowers his cup for him, curves his hand around the back of his neck and says, ‘That’s everyone else’s loss then. They have no idea what they’re missing, and if they knew, they’d be so envious right now….’ 

The first kiss is tentative, and somewhat hampered by Dirk’s coffee cup, which Todd carefully takes from him, putting it down on the nearest available surface. It leaves Dirk’s hands free, and after a long moment of hesitation, he puts them nervously on Todd’s waist.

‘Is this…?’

‘Dirk, it’s all okay.’ 

The second kiss is more certain, better coordinated. Todd slides one hand into Dirk’s hair and the other to the small of his back, edging closer. It feels like a huge step forward when he feels Dirk’s arms slide around him with just a hint of possession, humbled by the adoration shining in those startlingly blue eyes. 

‘This is all… new to me.’

‘I know.’

‘I”m going to mess it up.’

‘We’re both going to mess up. But we’ll work it out, we have done so far. Right?’ Dirk nods. ‘There are, however, a couple of ground rules we need to put in place.’ It’s testament to how well Todd knows Dirk that he reaches around to hold his hands in place at the very moment Dirk tries to step back. ‘Not about this. About you, and keeping you out of danger.’

‘I don’t actively seek it out.’

‘That’s exactly what you do. So, number one, if you get the urge to walk out of a diner because you sense the bad guys are close, you need to fight that urge and inform Farah and I.’ There’s a little guilty smile on Dirk’s lips and Todd can’t resist stretching up to kiss it. ‘Number two, if you get a hunch that a place might contain one or more portals to another world, you need to tell us before you go running off to investigate.’

‘I promise nothing,’ but there’s a teasing, mischievous shine to his eyes that Todd interprets as agreement. 

‘You’re so important to me. I can’t lose you after all we’ve been through to get here.’

Dirk ducks his head to rub his nose against Todd’s. ‘Funny, I was just thinking the exact same thing.’

#

It’s weeks before they see Amanda again. Todd and Dirk are spending a quiet Sunday in front of the television. Todd’s all but moved in to his apartment because it’s nicer than his, and there’s some structural damage to the walls, and a bullet hole in the ceiling upstairs, all of which needs attending to once a new landlord takes over.

They’re halfway through their Aliens marathon (because Dirk’s never seen any of it and Todd’s insistent), on the sofa in an untidy but oddly comfortable heap of limbs. When Dirk suddenly tenses, Todd does too. Then he hears the growl of the van.

‘Amanda!’ Todd’s excitement at the prospect of seeing his sister is tempered by Dirk’s innate nervousness at being in close proximity to the Rowdy 3. ‘Hey. You know they’re not going to hurt you, don’t you?’ He nods, but it’s a jerky movement, like he knows nothing for sure. 

Their jaunt into Wendimoor changed the dynamic between them all: brought he and Amanda back together, levelled things between Dirk and the Rowdy 3, deepened the intimacy of his own relationship with his best friend, his partner, his soulmate.

‘They see you as one of them now. They respect you.’ Dirk snorts, a little derisively, but some of the tension eases from him. ‘Can they come up?’ He has to ask, this is still Dirk’s apartment. 

‘Yes, of course.’

The one and only time the four 3s were in Todd’s apartment, it was the most claustrophobic feeling in the world; cowering in a corner while they destroyed everything he owned. The last time Amanda was in Todd’s apartment, it felt like the loneliest place in the world as she tore down his life.

Dirk’s apartment is nicer than Todd’s ever was. It’s bigger, not by much but it does have a separate bedroom. The Rowdy 3, Amanda, and Beast fill the space, but it doesn’t feel crowded. Beast leaps at Dirk when she first sees him. He gives her a reluctant, one-arm hug before releasing her and backing up as far as he can. Todd insinuates himself between the two of them once he’s done hugging Amanda. He hasn’t missed the fact that his sister was hand in hand with Martin when they walked in, but two can play at that. He won’t call it a game because he knows it isn’t, yet it doesn’t stop him wrapping an arm around Dirk’s waist when he offers them drinks, or sitting on the arm of the couch with his feet in Dirk’s lap as they down their beers and swap stories from the last two months.

He smirks at Amanda’s raised eyebrows and suggestive smiles. It’s a nice afternoon, all in all; nothing gets smashed and no one gets eaten. Beast spends most of the time on the windowsill looking out, once she realises sitting on Dirk’s lap isn’t an option. Amanda explains that the cave girl loves the open road, the city not so much, which is cool because the Rowdy 3 are the same way, and Amanda’s happy as long as she’s with them.

They leave around five; Amanda’s got a girls night out planned with Farah. She says something to Dirk before she leaves, something Todd doesn’t hear. 

The apartment seems empty for a short while, so they fill it with Alien Vs Predator, courtesy of Dirk’s new surround sound system. It’s such a patently ridiculous film that they the end up riffing on it together, and by the time the credits roll, they’re laughing so hard they’ve missed most of the dialogue. 

Dirk orders pizza and Todd fetches a couple of beers, and they spend the rest of the night on the sofa, finding terrible movies to take the piss out of. 

‘What did Amanda say to you before she left?’ Todd asks eventually. He didn’t think he wanted to know, but he does. He suspects it was something along the lines of, ‘if he breaks your heart, I’ll break his legs.’

‘She told me when your birthday is.’

‘She-‘ That’s unexpected. ‘Oh. Why would she….’

‘I suppose she thought, being your boyfriend, it was something I should know.’ He looks apologetic, of course he does, when he’s done nothing to be sorry about. ‘I didn’t mean to… to pry.’

‘How did you pry?’ He leans into Dirk’s side, resting his head on his shoulder. ‘She told you when my birthday. Even if you’d asked her, Dirk, it wouldn’t be prying. It’s not private.’ He realises something. ‘When’s your birthday?’

Dirk hesitates before he tells him. ‘Riggins used to bring me a chocolate cupcake on that same day every year. I think that’s how I know when the date is.’

‘Dirk….’ It’s just a couple of months off. ‘This year, we’re going to celebrate.’ He hopes this is the right thing to do. It’s difficult to know, sometimes. Dirk didn’t exactly have a normal childhood, some of his associations with things like holidays and celebrations are unpredictable.

‘Really?’

He sits up, primarily so he can see Dirk, and so Dirk can see him. ‘Really. We can have a party with cake, and games. And we can invite Farah, and Hobbs and Tina, and Amanda. Whoever you want.’

Dirk hugs him. ‘Thank you, Todd.’

It’s so easy to make him happy. For any other person, celebrating their birthday would be obvious, unremarkable. For Dirk, it’s a gift. 

‘I love you.’ He blurts it out into the gap between Dirk’s shoulder and his throat. He doesn’t mean to, but at the same time, he absolutely means it.  
Dirk freezes against him, then a second later, melts into him. The hug turns into an embrace and he hears, ‘I love you too.’

#

Todd kept his lies a secret for over ten years, until he confessed everything to a man he’d known less than a week, while they were on a road trip with a kitten that contained a shark, searching for something buried by a dead man who’d tried to kill them.

Dirk doesn’t talk about Blackwing, until he opens his heart to a man he’s known less than half a year, talking for hours about his dead parents, a military man who promised him safety but delivered terror and imprisonment, and a crazy rescue of the boy trapped in his adult coma. 

Todd and Dirk aren’t really the sharing type, unless it’s with each other. It makes them stronger, and somehow, they’ve known since the start that it would.


End file.
